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Growing Pains

From: In the Presence of the Wise

Her sharp glance peirces through one's soul as she focuses. I have been listening to her for hours now. As if a hungry being having seen a feast of wonderful, healthy food, my starving soul is overwhelmed with this discourse. And now she is saturating me with everything that could be contained in her elloquent words that draw subtle realities in the most tangible form.

It is strange. A question comes in my mind, and I wonder through a few moments of silence, and then her voice echos in the silence of the night addressing the very same question I had in mind. It is not accidental, but I choose not to ask her why, and how.

And she tells me of the realities no one ever spoke of. Every book I had opened would keep it a secret, or wrapped into layers of metaphores that I struggled to imagine through. There is no hush hush in this visit. It is all open, as open as my vulnerable soul.

As I am thinking about this very tragedy of being shoved away from realities that should be common knowledge, a smile brightens her round face. Then her crystal clear voice echos:

"Imagine you are a fetus. You are trapped in a warm, dark, and perhaps spacious and comfortable environment. All of a sudden you notice you are growing large. You complain: No, I like it to be spacious. But no one listens, and you keep on growing. Then you notice a painful process of getting these extra things called eyes. Water goes in them, and you hurt. You scream: What is this? I don't need this. Stop it now. But no one listens and your eyes grow to completion. Then you notice this lenghty process of getting these things called arms and legs. What a discomfort, you think to yourself. I don't need these accesories which get trapped and stop me from freely floating around. But no one listens, and your extremities grow to completion. But all along one voice keeps on reading to you: Hush. You don't know. But trust me you will need this someday. You see that voice doesn't tell you of a world outside the womb, for you can't imagine it. You can't imagine what light is, so it doesn't bother telling you how you will need eyes. It just tells you why you need them. You can't imangine walking, and talking, and smelling, and feeling. So it doesn't bother tell you how.

But, one day you come out, needing the same capacities that you hated to see grow in you. Imagine, somebody listening to this fetus, and stoping the growth of its eyes. It will never see, thus will never grasp that part of the reality which manifests itself in a manner that can be seen. Never will it know the beauty of the ocean of colors in a garden, nor the glory of a sunset. If it stoped growing ears, it shall never hear the melody of waves crashing against the coast, nor the horror of the thunder.

So is the hidden process of growing invisible parts of our souls, which are often gained with pain, through losses, failures, humiliations, and sufferings. Some growth comes with ease, comfort, joy, and peace. Yet those capacities you need the most are earned painfully. So your soul must grow eyes through which it could see those manifestation of Reality that can be only seen with the vision of soul. To have vision of soul, you must be ready for the pain that it will require to grow eyes. The choice is yours, eternal blindness, or a the pain of growing eyes.

And as to the concern of why so much delay in the process: well, every organ of your soul must grow in the time slot it is allowed to. Otherwise it will have a shape with organs that are under or over developed, incapable of performing the duties they are created for.

Be patient, and have trust in the Source of all.


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